I'm feeling overwhelmed tonight. Not sure why. I'm not as tired tonight & I didn't end up really feeling nauseated today, which is a change. I usually feel it at some point every day. Maybe these are the hormones that are kicking in and making me feel different. Less nausea, more anger/frustration/sadness/emotion in general.
Today was a rough day at work. Just a lot of stuff going on and not enough copies of me to take care of it all.
I have my first OB appointment tomorrow. I'm excited about that. Excited to know what the OB will say. The RE seemed really calm and collected, but the further I get along, the more I feel like he could have offered more information.
I kind of feel alone in some of this. I just don't feel like moms of singletons understand. I'm part of this "Moms of Twins" group on Facebook which is helpful, but a little scary. Lots of complications and bed rest in this group, which seems pretty horrible to me.
And I want to punch people who tell me I should be enjoying my pregnancy. If being pregnant is so much better than having these kids, then why do people have them? I'm cranky, tired, achy, & emotional and I feel like I can't tell anyone about how I'm feeling because I'm supposed to be skipping around in a fucking field of flowers like it's the happiest day of my life. If I get emotional, it's hormones and it's like "pat pat" on the head, you'll feel better soon. Patronizing. 207 more days? Just thinking that number the 40 times I've thought of it today makes me want to cry.
I'm trying to be stable here and not break down, but I'm so overwhelmed. I want to get things done, but I'm so tired and when I do get up and move around a lot, I start feeling sick. I know it could be MUCH worse, so I'm trying to be thankful for everything I haven't had to experience so far. Trying.
It's 8:40. I think I will go to bed now.
Thursday, August 30, 2012
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
So Tired, I'm Moving to Sweden
I have never been this tired in my life. It's 9:05am and all I want to do is go back to bed, but I have to work. If you have ever been pregnant, you probably know what I mean when I say I'm tired. If you haven't, let me explain. Imagine you have the worst cold you've ever had with fatigue that drives you down and makes you want to stop and lay down no matter where you are (kitchen, bathroom, middle of the street, walking down the hall at work). Minus all of the other cold symptoms and you're left with how I feel right now. And it's nearly constant. I had like 4 days a couple of weeks ago where I felt REALLY tired, then about 3 that I was okay, now I'm back to REALLY tired.
I have been resting a lot. I use my 15 minute breaks at work to take naps on my office floor. I get home & after dinner, which has mostly been left overs lately, I get in bed, probably around 8pm. I feel like I could sleep for the next week.
And I feel like I could cry right now. For no real reason other than the stress of thinking about having two babies and the incredible resistant feeling I get when thinking about going back to work when my babies are 8 weeks old. That just makes me sick. Did you know that MEXICO has 12 weeks of 75% paid leave?
Check out the chart of leave & pay during that leave on Wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parental_leave
Here are some things that PISS ME OFF:
1. Iraq, known for their oppression of women, gives 62 days at 100% pay. That's 20 more days than the US AND full coverage of pay.
2. The US is the ONLY country on there with ZERO leave mandated by the government.
3. I am moving to and getting a job in Sweden before these babies are born.
I have been resting a lot. I use my 15 minute breaks at work to take naps on my office floor. I get home & after dinner, which has mostly been left overs lately, I get in bed, probably around 8pm. I feel like I could sleep for the next week.
And I feel like I could cry right now. For no real reason other than the stress of thinking about having two babies and the incredible resistant feeling I get when thinking about going back to work when my babies are 8 weeks old. That just makes me sick. Did you know that MEXICO has 12 weeks of 75% paid leave?
Check out the chart of leave & pay during that leave on Wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parental_leave
Here are some things that PISS ME OFF:
1. Iraq, known for their oppression of women, gives 62 days at 100% pay. That's 20 more days than the US AND full coverage of pay.
2. The US is the ONLY country on there with ZERO leave mandated by the government.
3. I am moving to and getting a job in Sweden before these babies are born.
Friday, August 17, 2012
Jason + Tiffanie + 2 Babies....
...makes Tiffanie laugh and cry simultaneously like a crazy person.
Yes, you read that right... We are having twins. There are two yolk sacs, so there is a higher chance they are fraternal, but still a chance they could be identical.
Science has not discovered what causes identical (monozygotic) twins. It happens at virtually the same rate across cultures. One of life's little mysteries.
Fraternal (dizygotic) twins are typically an inherited condition, passed down on the mother's side. Women who have dizygotic twins in their family often ovulate two eggs each month (this is that part that is genetic and passed from mother to daughter). Twins also have a higher occurrence in women over 35.
Reactions
Mom (Vicki) - Sounded like she was having a heart attack. Apparently she was walking around at work and people started asking her if she was okay. She told them she just needed to sit down!
Mom (Teresa) - Said something like, "Well I'm just getting ALL of my grand babies at once now!!!"
Yes, you read that right... We are having twins. There are two yolk sacs, so there is a higher chance they are fraternal, but still a chance they could be identical.
Science has not discovered what causes identical (monozygotic) twins. It happens at virtually the same rate across cultures. One of life's little mysteries.
Fraternal (dizygotic) twins are typically an inherited condition, passed down on the mother's side. Women who have dizygotic twins in their family often ovulate two eggs each month (this is that part that is genetic and passed from mother to daughter). Twins also have a higher occurrence in women over 35.
Reactions
Mom (Vicki) - Sounded like she was having a heart attack. Apparently she was walking around at work and people started asking her if she was okay. She told them she just needed to sit down!
Mom (Teresa) - Said something like, "Well I'm just getting ALL of my grand babies at once now!!!"
Dad said something like, "When you do something, you do it right the first time!" :)
Grammy was very excited. She said, "You could have told me anything else & I would have less shocked than I am about this!"
Sunday, August 12, 2012
Hot & Sleepy!
8/12 - Okay, so I'm really not sleeping well. I didn't think this part of pregnancy would start this early. To be honest, I still don't really FEEL like I'm pregnant. No morning sickness at all.No peculiar food cravings. I'm not unusually tired.
But this sleeping thing... So I'm reading "YOU: Having a Baby, by Dr. Oz." It explains why you should sleep on your left side during pregnancy, as much as you can. Don't sleep on your stomach, for obvious reasons. Don't sleep on your back because it cuts of blood flow to the placenta. Limit how much you sleep on your right side because the vena cava, the main vein that takes blood to your placenta, is on the right side. So sleeping on your left side is the best option. Well, my left side is also the hip that is injured. Unfortunately I haven't had a cortisone shot since last August, so it's really hurting.
I have read that getting a cortisone shot during pregnancy is okay, but I think I would want to wait until the first trimester is over, just in case. Better safe than sorry.
And on the better safe than sorry category, alcohol. I haven't been drinking at all since we found out I was pregnant. Jason and I were having a conversation last night and talking about some studies we had read about alcohol consumption during pregnancy. I'm doing my best not to put any toxins in my body right now (not using anything with parabens in it, not cleaning with stuff with fumes, no alcohol), but these studies are all inconclusive or basically cancel each other out. The only thing experts all agree on is that HIGH alcohol consumption, 8 or more drinks per week, causes Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. Below that level, there are actually long-term studies that show that drinking moderately, 3-4 drinks per week, causes the baby's IQ level to go up. With that said, until there are some clear results that this is always the case, I'm not drinking.
But back to the sleeping thing... I spend at least an hour a night wide awake now. I love sleeping, but I am finding that my body is warmer than I like. Also, it's been like 80 in our room every evening. I think I got it down to 76 before I went to bed last night, but normally I sleep best when the room is around 65. I've researched to see if other people experience their body temperature going up when they are about ready to go to bed, and apparently it happens to a lot of people, but no one knows why. I actually get so hot at night that I wake up sweating or, if I'm lucky, I just have to turn over every hour or so in order to cool off my side that was against the bed.
But this sleeping thing... So I'm reading "YOU: Having a Baby, by Dr. Oz." It explains why you should sleep on your left side during pregnancy, as much as you can. Don't sleep on your stomach, for obvious reasons. Don't sleep on your back because it cuts of blood flow to the placenta. Limit how much you sleep on your right side because the vena cava, the main vein that takes blood to your placenta, is on the right side. So sleeping on your left side is the best option. Well, my left side is also the hip that is injured. Unfortunately I haven't had a cortisone shot since last August, so it's really hurting.
I have read that getting a cortisone shot during pregnancy is okay, but I think I would want to wait until the first trimester is over, just in case. Better safe than sorry.
And on the better safe than sorry category, alcohol. I haven't been drinking at all since we found out I was pregnant. Jason and I were having a conversation last night and talking about some studies we had read about alcohol consumption during pregnancy. I'm doing my best not to put any toxins in my body right now (not using anything with parabens in it, not cleaning with stuff with fumes, no alcohol), but these studies are all inconclusive or basically cancel each other out. The only thing experts all agree on is that HIGH alcohol consumption, 8 or more drinks per week, causes Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. Below that level, there are actually long-term studies that show that drinking moderately, 3-4 drinks per week, causes the baby's IQ level to go up. With that said, until there are some clear results that this is always the case, I'm not drinking.
But back to the sleeping thing... I spend at least an hour a night wide awake now. I love sleeping, but I am finding that my body is warmer than I like. Also, it's been like 80 in our room every evening. I think I got it down to 76 before I went to bed last night, but normally I sleep best when the room is around 65. I've researched to see if other people experience their body temperature going up when they are about ready to go to bed, and apparently it happens to a lot of people, but no one knows why. I actually get so hot at night that I wake up sweating or, if I'm lucky, I just have to turn over every hour or so in order to cool off my side that was against the bed.
Thursday, August 9, 2012
The First Days of Knowing
8/8 - Made some doctors appointments & talked to a pregnant coworker about an OBGYN. She recommended Suzanne Ramos. I called and made an appointment for 9/21 (should be 10 weeks). I then called my Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE). I had seen him a few times just to make sure all was good in the repro department. I would have rather known up front if I was going to have issues that to try for 6 months or a year and then find out. They wanted me to come in the next morning and do a blood test. Up until this point, I hadn't even thought about the fact that it might have been, although unlikely, a false positive.
I told Doug, my friend & coworker. I remembered a conversation of ours a few years back when he told me he would have been happy to have another child. Three weeks later when he told me his gf was pregnant, I was elated for them. I cried!!!
That got me thinking about when Brett & Barb announced that they were pregnant with Megan. It was Christmas of 1989 and they announced it while we were all hanging out in our living room. It just made Christmas that much better. I was so excited for them and for our family. There is just something about the news of a new baby in a family that hasn't had one in a while that is pretty darn exciting.
So after 19 years (since Blake was born), the Guyer/Evenson family will have a new little one to spoil. I can't wait.
8/9 - Went to the doctor & he called me later & confirmed that I am pregnant. Jason thinks I'm crazy about this, but I love when number patterns or repetitions happen. Here's some so far:
My birth date - 7/8/77
My birth weight - 8 lbs 7 oz
Day we found out we were pregnant - 8/7
HCG level from blood test - 778
I'm not a numerologist or anything, but it just amuses me.
And so far so good, I don't really have many pregnancy symptoms, so this makes me happy. If my pregnancy is anything like the two my mom had, it should be all good!
I told Doug, my friend & coworker. I remembered a conversation of ours a few years back when he told me he would have been happy to have another child. Three weeks later when he told me his gf was pregnant, I was elated for them. I cried!!!
That got me thinking about when Brett & Barb announced that they were pregnant with Megan. It was Christmas of 1989 and they announced it while we were all hanging out in our living room. It just made Christmas that much better. I was so excited for them and for our family. There is just something about the news of a new baby in a family that hasn't had one in a while that is pretty darn exciting.
So after 19 years (since Blake was born), the Guyer/Evenson family will have a new little one to spoil. I can't wait.
8/9 - Went to the doctor & he called me later & confirmed that I am pregnant. Jason thinks I'm crazy about this, but I love when number patterns or repetitions happen. Here's some so far:
My birth date - 7/8/77
My birth weight - 8 lbs 7 oz
Day we found out we were pregnant - 8/7
HCG level from blood test - 778
I'm not a numerologist or anything, but it just amuses me.
And so far so good, I don't really have many pregnancy symptoms, so this makes me happy. If my pregnancy is anything like the two my mom had, it should be all good!
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
8/7 - Our Big News
We are pregnant!!!
On 8/7, we were headed out to go wine tasting with Adria & Wyatt, but I decided to take a test before we went. I didn't say anything to Jason, but went upstairs. I figured I would take the test, set it down, then brush my teeth while it did its thing. Well, I didn't even get a chance to set it down before it showed the plus sign. I started shaking really badly & yelled for Jason to come upstairs.
Jason: What's up?
Me (shaking like a leaf!): mmmm, we are pregnant (showing him the test)
Jason: Cool (he hugged me)
So we called family & friends this is how those conversations went:
Mom (Vicki)
Me: Are you home from work?
Mom: No.
Me: Well I don't want to tell you this while you're driving, but I can't wait! I'm pregnant!
Lots of screaming & me telling her not to crash her car.
Mom (Teresa)
Jason: We are pregnant.
Lots of screaming & happiness. :) Tons of excitement to be having 2 babies coming within 3 months of each other, with Jackie being pregnant too!
Grammy was the only one that made me cry. When I said, "You're going to be a Great-Grammy next year, she started giggling like a little girl. I so wish I had this recorded. I can't describe the happiness I heard in her voice. I know she was grinning from ear to ear.
Brandi
"Awesome, congratulations! (Insert deviant laugh), I'm going to be drunk off my ass in Mexico!" (Family vacation for all of us to an all inclusive resort in November).
Jackie
Jason: We made your baby a cousin!
Jackie: Oh, you made one too!?!??
Dad (Ed)
Tif: You're going to be a grandpa again.
Silence
Dad: Who?
Tif: Me!!!!
Dad was very happy.
Uncle Mike cried when I told him he would be a great-uncle. Uncle Brett laughed like some deviant maniac.
On Skype with Megan, she jumped off of her couch and was so excited. Seeing her in October will be so awesome.
We only started trying in July, so I am feeling extra grateful that it happened so quickly. I don't know how I would have managed having to go through waiting a year or more for it to happen. I feel so very blessed.
I am about the worst secret keeper in the world. At the point of writing this (8/10), I have probably told waaaaay to many people already!
On 8/7, we were headed out to go wine tasting with Adria & Wyatt, but I decided to take a test before we went. I didn't say anything to Jason, but went upstairs. I figured I would take the test, set it down, then brush my teeth while it did its thing. Well, I didn't even get a chance to set it down before it showed the plus sign. I started shaking really badly & yelled for Jason to come upstairs.
Jason: What's up?
Me (shaking like a leaf!): mmmm, we are pregnant (showing him the test)
Jason: Cool (he hugged me)
So we called family & friends this is how those conversations went:
Mom (Vicki)
Me: Are you home from work?
Mom: No.
Me: Well I don't want to tell you this while you're driving, but I can't wait! I'm pregnant!
Lots of screaming & me telling her not to crash her car.
Mom (Teresa)
Jason: We are pregnant.
Lots of screaming & happiness. :) Tons of excitement to be having 2 babies coming within 3 months of each other, with Jackie being pregnant too!
Grammy was the only one that made me cry. When I said, "You're going to be a Great-Grammy next year, she started giggling like a little girl. I so wish I had this recorded. I can't describe the happiness I heard in her voice. I know she was grinning from ear to ear.
Brandi
"Awesome, congratulations! (Insert deviant laugh), I'm going to be drunk off my ass in Mexico!" (Family vacation for all of us to an all inclusive resort in November).
Jackie
Jason: We made your baby a cousin!
Jackie: Oh, you made one too!?!??
Dad (Ed)
Tif: You're going to be a grandpa again.
Silence
Dad: Who?
Tif: Me!!!!
Dad was very happy.
Uncle Mike cried when I told him he would be a great-uncle. Uncle Brett laughed like some deviant maniac.
On Skype with Megan, she jumped off of her couch and was so excited. Seeing her in October will be so awesome.
We only started trying in July, so I am feeling extra grateful that it happened so quickly. I don't know how I would have managed having to go through waiting a year or more for it to happen. I feel so very blessed.
I am about the worst secret keeper in the world. At the point of writing this (8/10), I have probably told waaaaay to many people already!
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